Happy New Year! Christmas is well and truly over and the only trace still looming reluctantly in the background is that unwanted Christmas gift, the decorations, the tree and the lights. In our home, we put up two trees, one slimline unthreatening fully decorated pop up one. My daughters hated it. They moaned and moaned and I gave in. It got rehoused on our stairs in the hallway. Just so you know my daughters are nearly 20 and 17 respectively 😅. I guess you really never grow too old for Christmas, before I could say, Jack Robinson, I found myself buying another tree. This time a beautiful 8 footer. Shiny and colourful with wonderful lights. The happy smile on my oldest daughter's face as she proceeded to decorate this new tree and place all the presents beneath it was so worth it.
Fast forward to today, the excitement is over until next December and our trees seem somewhat awkward and out of place in our sitting room and on the stairs. I can't wait for Saturday the 6th of January, which represents the 12th day of Christmas and traditionally here in the UK all the decorations are taken down. Our joint family goal is to beat last year's record of disassembling the trees, the lights, the outside frosting, the big Santa etc, tidy up, put back the furniture where it belongs, not fall off the ladder (yeah! that was me last January) in under an hour. Wish us luck.
Talking about goals, at the start of each new year, people set new goals and resolutions. Journals, planners and diaries experience an unprecedented spike in sales or in some cases sell out altogether. Goals to lose weight, be more positive, stop procrastinating, travel more, set new boundaries, find a new career, set up that new business, become more self-nurturing. The list is endless.
My household is the same, we set joint yearly goals, we have this elaborate process where we sit on the floor in the middle of our sitting room on the 1st of January ( when we all manage to eventually wake up after our phenomenal New Year's Eve in New Year Church service. There is always so much joy, gratitude, the atmosphere is electric, so much dancing, singing, praying hugging, we normally get home at about 3 am). Yes, as I was saying before I got all nostalgic and sidetracked, we sit down ad a family, review our goals, share our personal goals and in the spirit of accountability, review what went well, what we achieved both as a family and on a personal level. I understand this may sound alien to many but coming from a family of overachievers we have always done this. I guess my legal and project management background has also gone a long way to reinforce this family tradition. On a personal level, I am in the next phase of my 10-year plan, having achieved all but one of my personal goals for 2017. I suppose you could say I know a thing or two about not only setting goals but achieving them too.
I have taken this expertise into my coaching and mentoring services. As a coach at the end and beginning of each year, I run group workshops and online webinars focused on goal setting, vision boards and finding your why. Click here to get onto the next available session. Attitude is everything. In my local church, for instance, we have the cliche "Your Attitude Determines Your Altitude."
In today's blog, I will be touching on why having the right attitude is pivotal to achieving and meeting your goals in this new year.
The first step to meeting any goal is to start with your attitude towards it. Your thoughts and feelings towards an activity or idea guides your behaviour and influences your mood. Your attitude also impacts the way others view you, as well. It should come as no surprise that your perspective plays a direct role in your general happiness. It is crucial that you become aware of your attitude when embarking on a path to self-growth. Let’s consider some ways to focus on self-awareness and positive mindset.
Mind Your Emotional State
If you want to change your attitude, you first have to be mindful of it. Knowing how you’re feeling and being able to recognize certain emotions as you are experiencing them are imperative to regulating them.
One of the best ways to name an emotion is to notice the way your body feels when you encounter it. A little bit more of mindfulness throughout your day can help you to associate the symptom within yourself to the emotion.
For example, you may clench your teeth when you feel angry or get a slight stomach ache when nervous. Part of being mindful of your feelings is to also accept them. Both positive and negative emotions are part of the human experience, so don’t beat yourself up for your difficult moments.
Understand Your Power
Part of a poor attitude can often be attributed to the fact that we allow other people or even our feelings to control us. You give up your power when you react negatively to a situation, a person or your emotions. Angry or sad reactions happen.
The problem is when these negative feelings invade your attitude and remain for too long. Bad feelings don’t usually go away easily.
Changing your thoughts and beliefs about their cause is required in order to banish them in favour of a more positive outlook. This is where questioning your attitude and re-framing your thoughts comes in handy.
Turn Thoughts into Actions
Once you’ve been able to re-frame your thoughts, it’s time to turn them into positive actions. Instead of moping or pouting about unfair treatment at work, decide that sometimes misunderstandings happen. Then figure out whether there is anything you can do to improve the situation. Perhaps talking to your superior at a later time could help to sort things out and put them in your favour. If not, you may be able to develop a strategy to demonstrate your knowledge and positive contribution to the company.
Taking some kind of proactive step will almost always lead you to feeling more in control and confident. When you feel more powerful over your life, you will have a more positive attitude.
As they say, attitude is everything. Taking steps to improve yours will have a great effect on your life in a multitude of ways. An attitude shift requires effort and mindfulness. It isn’t as simple as flipping a switch. By putting these suggestions into practice, you’ll be well on your way to achieving a favourable mindset and one step closer to meeting your goals!
Whatever you do, take the process in your stride, it is all part of your Believe and Live Again recovery, bounce back and transition journey from being a “we” to becoming a “me”.
If you would like to have an informal chat about it, don't hesitate to get in touch on: +44 208 938 3672 and myself or a member of my team will gladly schedule a Complimentary Believe and Live Again Discovery session or a 30 minute "Forgive and Let Go" consultation and together, we could be embarking upon the Believe and Live Again 5 R's journey to heal your heart, outgrow your challenges and let go of the past so that your glorious future can finally emerge.
Once again, I invite you to contact me or schedule a time to talk, call: +44 (0) 208 938 3672 (24 hours) or click on the pink "Contact" at the bottom right-hand side of this page and this will take you into my "Let's Talk" contact form. Kindly complete the form and you will get a callback.
In the meantime, Keep Smiling, Keep Strong and Keep Believing (that you can).
Best Wishes and God's Blessings
Inspirational Woman of the Year Award 2017
Best Selling Author – Reinvent YOU! How to Move from “We to Me” After Divorce
Multi Award Winning Serial Entrepreneur
Divorce Reinvention, Abuse and Breakup Recovery Coach
World’s Number 1 Mum
Zina Arinze, the proud mother of two wonderful gifts - her daughters, is a bubbly woman of faith fondly known as the Divorce Reinvention Queen, International Speaker, Best Selling Author, Radio Broadcaster, Talk Show host, Multi-award winning Business Start-up expert, Serial Entrepreneur and founder of Believe and Live Again: a Post-Divorce Lifestyle Coaching, Abuse Recovery and Reinvention Mentoring service helping female professionals, businesswomen, entrepreneurs and women of faith around the globe, swiftly recover from the grief, trauma and stigma of divorce, separation, domestic abuse or relationship breakdown by giving them clarity for their radiant future so that they are able to smoothly transition their mindsets from “we” to “me”, reconnect to their positive of self, regain their feminine power and walk in the healing restorative power of God. A lawyer by training and armed with an MBA and membership of several professional and entrepreneurial boards, Zina has over 15 years in IT Project Management Consultancy, Training and Capacity Building experience from the Public, Private and Not for Profit sectors. Zina is also very passionate about Gender Empowerment, building lasting relationships and encouraging the discovery, development, and deployment of hidden talents.